A week of practicing yoga and contemplation at Present Moment Retreat led me to today’s reflection in which I considered how divorce  mediation and yoga are amazingly similar…..why wouldn’t they be similar?  Both improve substantially….and even require…. the practitioner to stay in the “Present Moment”!  Yoga and divorce  mediation have both been around for centuries and have many different models……but there seem to be many similarities, it is no wonder I am drawn to both.

According to Wikipedia “Yoga” comes from the Sanskrit word ‘yuj’ meaning to yoke, join or unite. Today I learned that yoga actually means  “concentration”….. which ultimately leads to unity and liberation.  This tidbit was told to me by Ryan Kelly, one of the exceptional yoga instructors on staff at Present Moment Retreat; (Ryan also managed to release an extremely painful knot from my lower back area…but this is another story!).

Eight days of yoga…five different practice instructors…never the same practice…all about concentration and unity…….How is it similar to DIVORCE MEDIATION?  To name a few……………….

Yoga practice depends  on:

Instructor and Participants

Needs of the Participants

Emotional state of the Participants

Goals of the Participants

Instructor’s intuitive ability to sense what process best serves the Participants that day

Time of day

Training background of the instructor

Knowledge and ability of the participants and the instructor

Divorce Mediation depends  on:

Divorce Mediator

Clients

Needs of the Clients

Emotional state of the Clients

Goals of the Clients

Mediator’s  intuitive ability to sense what process best serves the Cliens that day

Time of day

Training background of the mediator

Knowledge and ability of the mediator as well as the clients

Many other similarities could be listed……both practices take concentration and effort…leading to unity/agreement….and ultimately liberation!  I invite you to let me know your thoughts and join in the discussion..in the mea time….I am going to take my last restorative yoga class and be in the Present Moment!

~Debra

Hello!  Whole Mediation Blog was recently added to the website……. thank you so much for taking the time to check it out!

Sitting on the sandy, beach, listening to the waves roll and pound at Present Moment Retreat, Troncones, Mexico, I am basking in the energy of my personal retreat, the perfect time for renewal and rebalancing….and I thought it is a time to reflect on last year and on all of the incredible changes that occurred in my mediation practice before celebrating the new year!  After all……it makes sense to me that in order to move ahead with new year objectives, it is important to appreciate the prior year.

So here goes………

New Business Name……”Whole Mediation”…captures a mediation process that is total, entire, complete.

New Brand…….keeps the image of the gingko leaf, albeit abstract, a symbol of unification of opposites, strength, longevity and hope for a better future.

New Website………… Whole Mediation …. shares information, portrays mediation style and educates clients, colleagues and the public.

New Office …….conveniently located in the Madison Valley, close to downtown Seattle, offers strollable streets, easy parking, and friendly coffee shops.

New Training……Where the Science of Mindfulness Meets Legal Practice: Transforming Legal Work in the Conceptual Age through Integrative Practices ……. advancing holistic mediation, collaborative law and conflict resolution practices through training programs with Karen Bonnell, founder of  Transforming Relationships.

Why all the “new” you might ask?  Please stay tuned in and I will discuss this….I plan to get moving and write on a variety of topics…mediation for clients, mediation for practitioners, mindfulness and the law or mediation…..and random thoughts about conflict resolution….. for your enjoyment, knowledge and amusement……please join in the discussions and let me know what you want to hear…if you would like to be a guest contributor…..let me know, I invite and welcome your input!

Next topic…….what mediation means to me!  More soon!

Debra

Full day! Started with meeting Chef Patti and Carl, the drummer, in Palm Springs….went over plans and menus – as anticipated, Chef Patti is on her game … the more she suggested, the more we nodded, “yes”. Started with the dark chocolate with pepper dessert for Thursday evening and continued through the homemade pulled chicken enchiladas complete with fresh white corn stripped from the cob … oh, and fresh blueberry pancakes Sunday morning to support you through our final session. Carl provided two CD’s of his music for sampling – generous and excited to take us to the next level with his drums Saturday night.

On to the Joshua Tree Retreat Center, where the Science for  Mindfulness Meets Legal Practice retreat happens in March – surpasses expectations. The accommodations include a soaking pool right off the main meeting room, indoor and outdoor seating for meals, a beautiful fireplace for the exclusive use of our retreat participants which is and outdoor fire-pit (lots of atmosphere for the cooler high desert evenings), and more than comfortable sleeping arrangements — all for the exclusive use of our retreat participants. Pictured above is the Chalice Well, a replica of the famous well in England … just a sample of the features that make the retreat center an ideal place for lawyers to practice mindfulness and learn how to integrate it into work and everyday life.

Lastly, right before sundown, we snuck into the park to get a quick look at the ancient rock formations that give this part of the earth such a unique and awesome look. Joshua Trees and numerous cacti species decorate the landscape. Can’t wait to share this with you in person in March – right in time for the beginning of the bloom!

For more information on the retreat, please call us or check out the brochure!

We welcome your questions and input!

~Karen and Debra

Baking is definitely not my forte….I will stay with mediation rather than become a baker!  Usually people ask me to bring salads to Thanksgiving dinner, but this year I was asked to bring pumpkin pie and a sweet potato dish….sounds easy….how hard can it be?  So I follow the recipe on the back of the can…rated FIVE stars!

Low and behold…..a cupboard full of spices…bags, jars, cans….every spice you can imagine…according to the recipe I needed nutmeg, cinnamon, and cloves…..after taking about 50 containers out of my cupboard I found about ½ tsp. of old chunky nutmeg, cinnamon STICKS but no ground cinnamon and a full container of ginger (never even opened), but no ground cloves (yes, of course I have whole cloves)…….what was I going to do with three containers of cardamom, two full containers of cayenne, a bag of sumac (yes you read this right), and something with no label that has a delicious unidentifiable fragrance?  I am just about to grind up a cinnamon stick and some whole cloves, (evidently sometimes resourcefulness is necessary when baking), when I spot a container of ground allspice….did you know allspice is ahhah….cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves?  I didn’t…so we shall see if this is an acceptable substitute.  Who ever said baking is an exact science unlike cooking which can be ad-libbed?

Now I cannot wait to make the pie crust!….and the sweet potato dish…or is it yams???

No telling what will happen with the whipped cream….all week I have been experimenting with different flavors………almond, vanilla, mint…..yum!

How does this relate to mediation?  Mediation has no recipe for all….being resourceful, taking chances, creating options………you never know what is in the cupboard to help you get to the goal…..keep trying!

Happy Thanksgiving to all…and remember…………there is much to be thankful for AND…….being adventuresome with food can be fun!

~Debra

As with any conference the stage is set before the working sessions begin. Tonight five presenters set the stage and the theme of the conference:  Change is happening in the legal profession!

Key points:

Dean Christopher Edley, Berkeley School of Law, said the reason Berkeley decided to host this conference is because Berkeley is cool.   I am extremely enthused to know that law schools are getting involved in the mindfulness movement; changing how young lawyers are taught seems to me to be the place to begin.

Norman Fischer reminded us that we encounter our clients at times of stress and difficulty.  Clients come to us when they are in trouble or trying to avoid trouble; we connect with our clients at times when they are most vulnerable and they expect us to give them peace of mind and handle their situation.  Our profession is highly stressful; mindfulness helps us to fully connect with ourselves and to connect with others so that we can be committed, motivated, patient, energetic, compassionate and supportive.    In stark contrast lawyers have traditionally been taught to be efficient, zealous, fighters, abstract and reserved.

Charlie Halpern, a public interest entrepreneur and prior chair of the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society spoke about how mindfulness teaches us to have more focused awareness so that we are able to practice law with wisdom and compassion and have more satisfying work and personal lives.

The core ideas described mindfulness as a way to cultivate wisdom and compassion and bring these qualities to our legal practices…..how we have been practicing law is simply not sustainable.

Personally…….I cannot wait to participate in either a yoga or qi gong session tomorrow morning…..that will be a first for me at a conference for lawyers!

~Debra

Zoketsu Norman Fischer,a poet and Zen Buddhist priest humorously and skillfully guided a meditation retreat this afternoon which seemed to set the tone before the conference officially begins tonight.

Norman Fischer  answered the question what do we need to know to practice mindfulness meditation?    A couple of interesting points stand out:

Meditation is easy

Meditation is not rocket science

Anyone can do it

People sometimes smile when they think of attorneys meditating………..but as you can see in this picture………here they are ….80-100 attorneys doing a walking meditation exercise…….they left their busy workload to practice mindfulness…….this makes me smile!

~Debra

Not surprising……. The Mindful Lawyer: Practices & Prospects for Law School, Bench, and Bar will take place October 29-31, 2010, at the University of California at Berkeley School of Law… is a sellout!

This event will be the first ever national conference exploring the integration of meditation and contemplative practices with legal education and practice. The conference will offer a blend of academic presentation, practical experience and discussion, meditation and movement practice, and recent developments in neuroscience and psychology relevant to meditation practice.  This is the first ever national conference exploring the integration of meditation and contemplative practices with legal education and practice.

Presenters include such distinguished names as:

• Zoketsu Norman Fischer, a poet and Zen Buddhist priest.
• Gary Friedman, co-founder and director of The Center for Mediation in Law in Mill Valley, California.
• Patton Hyman, President and Development Director of Tail of the Tiger, Inc.
• Jack Kornfield, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, Massachusetts, with fellow meditation teachers Sharon Salzberg and Joseph Goldstein; he is also a founding teacher of the Spirit Rock Center in Woodacre, California.
• Scott L. Rogers, M.S., J.D., the director and founder of the Institute for Mindfulness Studies and creator of Jurisight®, the mindfulness-based program developed for legal professionals.

These are only a handful of the talented, skilled presenters.  The complete list can be found at the conference web site.

I feel extremely fortunate….I will be attending this conference and I was also asked by Stephanie West Allen to be a conference blogger!   See how you can join in the conference at Stephanie West Allen’s blog idealawg.

Thank you for are taking the time to visit this new mediation blog!   This is a very exciting time for me because not only is this blog new but there are many “new”, positive changes to announce………

• My new business name is now “Whole Mediation” with a new brand
• My new website is www.wholemediation.com
• My new office location is in the Madison Valley area of Seattle

Why all the “new” you might ask?

Evolution!

Having a belief, hope and faith that better ways of solving conflict are constantly evolving……and feeling energized, inspired and motivated,  I decided to be even more proactive in my effort to advance mediation. Not just to advance any approach to mediation, but  approaches that I consider to most beneficial and humane, particularly if relationship issues are at stake.

“Whole Mediation”, was chosen as my business name to indicate a mediation style that is integrative, including pragmatism as well as compassion, supporting clients’ personal values, and using an inter-disciplinary team model.  The website was updated to be more client friendly and to depict my approach to mediation.

This Whole Mediation blog enables me to address mediation topics that are outside of the “divorce” sphere and to provide you ith a forum to discuss the changes that are occurring in conflict resolution or as I like to call it “conflict revolution”.   The “real divorce mediation” blog will continue to specifically address divorce topics.

I hope that you will enjoy my new blog and improved site.   More importantly, I hope that this blog and the new web site advance and improve conflict resolution methods.   Would you like to participate in the dialogue?  You are invited and encouraged to add your comments.

Thanks for visiting!

~Debra